Tuesday, July 31, 2012

My first song demo!!!!

So I was just fiddling around with GarageBand one day because I had several loops stored up from LooperMan, and I decided to make something instrumental out of them. This is a DEMO, which means it is an unfinished song. I may later include vocals, that could either mean mine or someone else's, and I am going to add smoother dynamics and correct a couple of sound errors. Anyway, listen and tell me what you think. If you like it, leave me a comment or you can send me an email requesting a download.

Enjoy!!! :D

Update: OK, uploading a private video directly onto Blogger is just ridiculous... I literally waited 6 hours and the video wasn't finished yet. So instead I got a Soundcloud account, uploaded it there, a viola, after about five minutes it was ready to go. Click the link to listen.

Saturday, July 28, 2012

It'S AlmOST 2 Am!!!111!1!!11!!!!!

Yeah and I'm still awake. I'm WIDE awake. Darn it, this would be the perfect night for me to do a night watch with the Lord, but unfortunately I have my daily duties as a daughter and a big sister so I must be energetic and alert for my folks when I wake up tomorrow (oh wait, it IS tomorrow...today).

But I thought I would make a very short post (well, short for me since I tend to rattle on) about a realization I had an hour ago. I was just here on my bed making dance music on my Macbook Pro when suddenly, out of the grey, I sat up, looked onward, struck an epic pose as if I were in a hero flick, and thought to myself, "I am so blessed to be single right now. I am so glad that I am single."


OK, I mostly just continued fiddling around on my mac when I realized that, I didn't actually move at all, but I really am glad to be single! God has me right now. No, that doesn't mean that I am going to join a convent right now or be living alone for the rest of my life, that just means I am exclusively with God right now. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is cool.

And if you are single and happen to be feeling the single blues right now?

It's amazing how so many people fall into deep and udder despair over not having a partner to love on at all times. Love does crazy things to you. Makes you depressed,

it can make you sad,

or..... hee hee.... *snicker, snort*......

                                                         Internet meme faces make me laugh.

I saw this cheesy little glittery animated graphic on a friend's website at the age of twelve that I still remember. It said something like, "When you are single, all you notice are the happy couples. When you are in a relationship, all you notice are the happy single people." Now I just know that, for the most part, this statement isn't true, but it does help me remember how happy I could be that I am not "taken"... Taken away from my father in Heaven, no way Jose! 


I ain't going to bed. I'm going to read a book. Good night!!!! Or not.

Some random photo I just found surfing Google. My search wasn't even related to
the fact that I am awake. God speaks in strange ways!! 

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Ever wondered...

...why reading and sitting on the toilet go together so well? I haven't. 'Til recently, like a few days ago. Man, bathrooms are pretty awesome once you think about it!

Anyway this post isn't really about toilets n' bathtubs. It's about me. Because you all should know, It's ALL about me! (Not really, duh.)

I just wanted to talk a bit about what's been going on lately in my life, since well, this is my blog. Lately I've been receiving the message from Heaven over and over "to sing a new song," and "to sing the sweeter song," and "to do something different". Since this message is fairly "new" for me, I'm still going about doing life and asking God what he means by that. With a message that important, it's going to be a gradual learning process for me, I'm sure, so I am not expecting any answers right now. Patience is needed for God's lessons and that's another good lesson for me to learn since I tend to be a pretty impatient person. So far what I've learned from this process is that God is taking me a different direction than I expected. For example, ever since I could hold a pencil, I've been an artist. I love to draw, paint, sculpt with clay, and create things with my hands. I thought that maybe that natural talent would be a part of my future, like my career, etc. But lately it seems that God has introduced me to another talent that I apparently have that He wants me to use for His glory instead. I had no idea He would want me to do something other than what I've been doing, but that's the way God is. Of course, this doesn't mean I give up art completely or that it's NOT used for His glory, HECK NO, but He just simply wants me to do use another medium to send His messages to others. And that's ok. Use me the way you want to, Father.

But besides that, something else occurred to me.....

.....Sing to the Lord a new song....  I feel like God has been telling that to all of His children for a loooooong time. Because, like the book of Ecclesiastes says, nothing is NEW under the sun!!! Sure, we're living in "the future" right now, with technology, etc., but honestly, what hasn't changed over time? Ever since the fall of Adam and Eve, there has been war, famine, world hunger, poverty, disease, hatred against our brothers, separation, broken love, and confusion on what's right and wrong! Why? Because of our OWN choices! People always test Christians by asking "If God is really good and loving like you say He is, how come (insert bad event here)?" Many "Christians" don't even know how to answer. This, my friends, has been going on forever. You can even look in the Bible and see that even God's most loyal prophets have screwed up. Yes it's true, all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God, and sometimes we really make fools of ourselves. When I get to college there's constant pressure to party, have sex with a hundred guys, and to "live it up". This has been bearing down on me hard everywhere I go. So what happens if I give in? EVERYONE'S doing it!

*yawn* BOOOOORING. Heard all THAT before......

My mom told me once that what the world really desires is someone who's different. I don't know about you, but I think the coolest people in the room are always the ones who wear the artsy clothing and don't care what others think, the ones who would rather play the bagpipes than the electric guitar, the ones who do math for fun, and who aren't afraid of who they are. They're weird. I've found that people generally are  naturally attracted to that kind of person. These are the ones who, in high school, were probably made fun of or put down by others.

The ones who don't change despite the constant pressure are the strong ones. They're not afraid of the world, because, honestly, what could the world possibly do to them besides destroy them only if they were to give into its pressures?

What automatically turns the cool factor WAY up with any person is when they are not afraid of who they are because God fearfully and wonderfully created them, thus they are not ashamed of the gospel or of God. They never miss an opportunity to share what they know to be true to others, and they expect persecution, but WALK onward anyway. That's what the world really has been longing for. Now I'm not talking about the "team Jesus" cheese that "Christian" teens sometimes do, especially when they wear their Christian shirts and count that as evangelizing or expressing their faith. Hey, Christian tees are cool and all, but people should be able to tell you are a Christian by your very presence, not by what you wear on the outside.

So now, moving onto something even more important. Here is the REAL question that is connected to the title of this post... (not the toilet question)

Ever wondered...
...what your song sounds like?

When I get to Heaven, I want to see God's works in my life orchestrated through every fiber of my being, woven perfectly into a pleasant song, because I want to be perfect as God is perfect. Others will tell me perfection isn't possible, and that's true, well, on the world's standards. God gave us forgiveness and redemption for when we do mess up, and He died so that we can BE like HIM!

As our callings become more evident in our lives, never fail to seize the opportunity to do what God has set out for you. The world needs Him. Help light the way.

Bye bye my keyboards! God bless you all.

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Remembering Those from the Colorado Massacre

Twelve people were killed and 58 were injured in Aurora, 

Colo., during a sold-out midnight premiere of the new 

Batman movie "The Dark Knight Rises." 

The shooting was the worst in the U.S. since the Nov. 5, 

2009, attack at Fort Hood, Texas.

Alexander J. Boik, age 18.
Jonathan Blunk, age 26. 
Jesse Childress, age 29.
Gordon Cowden, age 51.
Jessica Ghawi, age 24.
John Larimer, age 27.
Matt McQuinn, age 27.
Micayla Medek, age 23.
Alex Sullivan, age 27.
Alexander C. Tever, age 24.
Rebecca Wingo, age 32.
Veronica Moser-Sullivan, age 6.

These men and women, along with a little girl, have all died in a senseless and brutal attack made by James Holmes four days ago. During opening night of The Dark Knight Rises, Holmes got in front of the theater and just open-fired. These are the twelve people who have died:

Blunk jumped in front of his girlfriend when the killer fired their direction. He died saving her life. McQuinn and Teves also died as heroes; McQuinn and his girlfriend's brother both tried to shield her. She and her brother survived, but McQuinn was left behind. Teves died protecting his girlfriend as well.

Medek wasn't sure what she wanted to do with her life. She worked at Subway and was continuing education in hopes of getting a higher-paying job. Her friends described her as "very spiritual and close to God."

Cowden, the oldest of the twelve to die, brought his two teenaged children with him to the theater. His life was taken, but by the grace of God his kids escaped unharmed. A family spokesperson described Gordon Cowden as a "true Texas gentlemen that loved life and his family."

According to his personal Facebook page, Alexander  J "AJ" Boik was an independent distributor for Organo Gold, a coffee company, and lived in Aurora, Colorado. 

Ghawi was an aspiring sports journalist who also went by the name Jessica Redfield. Jessica Ghawi previously survived a mass shooting in a Toronto mall and ever since then she believed that she should never take one second of life for granted.

Sullivan was celebrating his 27th birthday. He tweeted one hour before the movie, "Oh man one hour till the movie and its going to be the best BIRTHDAY ever". The next day was to be his first wedding anniversary with his wife, Cassie. 

Wingo joined the Air Force after high school, and served as a translator in Mandarin ChineseChildress was also in the Air Force  as a reservist and a cybersystems operator on active duty. Larimer himself had served in the Navy about a year and was attached to a cryptology (information operations) unit.

Veronica was a cute little blond girl who was just learning how to swim and was excited about life. Her mother is in the hospital right now in critical condition, suffering from gun shot wounds in her neck and abdomen, and doesn't yet know that her 6-year-old daughter is dead. 

Pray for these people and their families. 

May God have mercy on them

Pray for those who were injured

That they will recover safely

And pray for the killer, James Holmes

Who may suffer the death penalty

May God have mercy on us and on the whole world.

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

You know what I despise????

Whenever you take the time to type something really meaningful but it's a tad long and then you send it to/post it for someone, and then they write/comment back and as you're reading their comment you're thinking, they totally skipped over all this. They were probably intimidated by all dem phat paragrafs*....

Or when you recommend a book/article for someone to read, and then you ask them if they've read it, and they say yes, and then you tell them about your favorite part, and they "don't remember" that part at all. **


And yet I am so guilty of this. Perhaps if I change my ways it will make a difference in this crooked reading world. I could learn a valuable lesson from this. Now I am going to "read" a book.... Bye you fools. You know I love you.

*On purpose case you wer wundderinghkn

**YOU HAD BETTER HAVE READ THIS WHOLE ARTICLE. It was frikkin short!!!!!! It was only 144 words, actually, not including these last notes. 

If you skipped over the article just to find the little stars, I'm lolling because.... the irony...

Monday, July 16, 2012

ANIMALISTIC part 2: Why we love celebs

Why do we like celebs so much? Let's start small and work our way up. (CLAIRE I ACCEPT YOUR CHALLENGE)

First and most arguably the easiest identified reason is that celebs are entertaining. They make us laugh, cry, and they keep us engaged. They intrigue us, inspire us, and keep us wanting more of them. Simple

Celebrities are also unrealistically sexy. Good-looking. We think they're cute. Oddly enough we can be attracted to someone without ever meeting them or seeing them in person. We then can get to know them and understand their personality without them ever knowing who we are. We can fall for them as a person or fall for their performance, either way, once we figure out that we like them (or how in love with them we are) we'll daydream about them and think about them, because after all we do "know" them.

If only I could meet them, we'd be such good friends. 

Some of us pursue a celeb because of a crush we may have on them, others because they admire that particular person's work, some because, well, the bottom line is that celebs (or their works) are, simply put, appealing.

Celebs are always under the eyes of a critic. They can be publicly reported for anything. They are praised or brought-down by the world because they either excel or screw up. Either way, celebs are a hot topic for what they do.

Celebs have status. They are well-known, thus it is fun to know who they are along with everyone else. A celebrity's job is attract as many eyes toward them as possible. They've got to look good and do good to "be" good. The public's opinion matters to them. They are fun to talk about.

The way so-and-so portrayed that character? What an excellent performance. His new single is so fun to dance to. That guy is so talented, he's got a good voice. Her performance on America's got Talent just blew me away! How entertaining! 

But there is also a backwards method of gaining attention that is just as (if not more) effective than the latter. And that is being the bad guy. If you are bad enough, you'll be talked about enough. This could be the playboy with a million girls on him or the girl who's known for sleeping around. It is cool to be bad, to break boundaries, to be a rebel, to appeal to the crowd sexually. It sets a statement, and it brings forth the unfortunate general fact that girls like the bad boys and that guys like the bad girls. 

The other side to that is being a total jerk. They screw up so we don't have to.

What she did was so scandalous! I can't believe that guy did that to his wife. Last night's performance was terrible, he ought to be kicked off the show. She got so drunk at that party she was dancing in the streets in her lingerie. How embarrassing!

Celebrities also happen to also be very influential. Why? Well, because they are the action figures in the media industry. There will always be the writers, directors, coordinators, etc., but there has to be someone there to stage it, to sing it, to bring it. Those who bring it are the ones who are seen. The ones who are seen are the ones who are followed. The ones who are followed then get paid. The ones who are paid have status. The ones who have status are living the dream. We are always encouraged to chase our dreams, could chasing a celebrity be linked to that? Think about it. We are fueled by envy in a way.

We also look up to celebs because of our own selfish desires to be sexy and have all the money and be loved by others. We want what they have. It keeps us wondering, wishing...

She's so pretty, I wish I looked like her. He's got all the ladies, I wish more girls liked me. What is it they have that I do not?

They are also perfect for influencing the government. When they support a certain cause, politician, or organization, and they gain much praise from the public for it, it is easy to gather up the votes, support, and money needed to get things launched. (Money makes the world go round, eh? eh?)

It is exceedingly rare nowadays for one person to NOT have thoughts cross their mind about being famous. Whether we necessarily want fame or not, we desire it. It is in our nature to be well respected and looked up at for who we are. With all this influencing, money-making, selfish-thought provoking, and makeup applying going on, you gotta think, what an effective and successful system America has constructed! It subtly digs into our innermost desires and lets out what we want to see happen! In the meantime we 'normal' everyday folk go about doing everyday jobs. Making everyday life what it is. Those in the high life hear from us and are lifted up for it. So what does this all mean for believers?

King Solomon in the Bible had it all, man. He was probably the guy who experienced the high life better than anyone else ever in HISTORY. But even he knew that none of it could satisfy. And he had it ALL. Or, so he thought. Our hearts constantly desire fulfillment and satisfaction through it. Worldly satisfactions therefore seem like fulfillment. It's not. It is like "chasing wind". When we don't know the Lord, the world is literally all we've got. We can't even stretch our arms around the world! It just doesn't work for us like salt replacing sugar in a cake. I believe chasing celebrities has to do with that.


Personally I continually pray for celebrities that I like (or dislike) because well, I love em. Not the way the world does, but the way Jesus does. They are people, just like you and me, and instead of bashing and mindlessly praising, let's love em. The way God would. That's what celebrities don't get a lot of: love. We can do that, can't we? Let's lose the fluff and get lovin'.

Oh and , btw, I love you too :) *MUAH*

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

ANIMALISTIC part 1 - The Animal Inside

          In some aspects evolution is real. Over time human beings discover, create, and alter how this world works. Our behavior changes with it, so do our standards, morals, and what we consider normal. Now consider this question: do our current, common moral standards link to animalistic characteristics? First of all, just what is an animal? 

According to the dictionary, here is what the word animal means:

Animal: 1 any member of the kingdom Animalia, comprising multicellular organisms that have a well-defined shape and usually limited growth, can move voluntarily, actively acquire food and digest it internally, and have sensory and nervous systems that allow them to respond rapidly, tostimuli: some classification schemes also include protozoa and certain other single-celled eukaryotes that have motility and animallike nutritional modes.

Yeah yeah, ok we get that. But what's even more interesting (and shorter and sweeter) are the definitions that comes after:

2 any such living thing other than a human being. 

   OK, if you're sure... 

3 a mammal; as opposed to a fish, bird, etc.

   Yeah, yeah, we ALL know that fishes and birds AREN'T animals. OK, they are, but anyway moving on...

4 the physical, sensual, or carnal nature of human beings; animality: i.e. the animal in every person.

The animal in every person, eh? OK, so let's use that example as if it's a proven fact. So all of us have an animal inside of us in one way or another. 

Perhaps it's when we attempt to satisfy our innermost desires in guilty pleasures, when we surrender to self-indulgence whether or not we know it is damaging. More than half the time, however, we are unaware of the damaging effect our hearts must endure when we give into our sinful nature. After all, sin is what brought pain and suffering to this world. And obliviousness. Even our everyday selfish choices send something the wrong way, and that's usually ourselves. 

Like most animals, it's only natural for us humans to adapt after the environment we grow up in. What we're exposed to and what we're taught shape our ways of thinking and behaving. When our parents raise us well it is likely we will make better choices in life. When our parents ignore us or, even worse, abuse us, we are severely bruised, and it changes the person we will become no matter what. The same can be said for our school experiences, our friends, relatives, and especially our choices in media. With how abundantly used media itself is today, it shouldn't be surprising how communicative and influential it is in today in our everyday lives.

Ever since the "Sexual Revolution" in the 60's, various forms of media like ads, magazines, books, tv, and music were used to express a new kind of freedom; one that promises no boundaries in anything that we choose do.  These so-called "boundaries" are usually used to describe morals, rules, and religion, and are often painted as unnatural and oppressive. They thought, "Hey! Let's break loose from our cage and let wild what was meant to be free!" Good words if you were becoming a Christian, maybe, but if you are talking about unleashing the reckless temptations that bug you all the time, you're doomed. 

Before I move on, here are a very few pictorial examples of animal encouragement from the media:

Pop music albums/singles

Katy Perry as an alien in the "E.T." music video, comes to
earth and later takes the form
of human with various African
animals' features

Miley Cyrus as a peacock. Besides the obvious sexual
implications, note also what her animal implies.
This photo is from her music video,
"Can't Be Tamed".
Subtlety at it's best, ladies and gentlemen.
Or not.
Lady Gaga as a bizarre, mythical lizard-like creature.
Promotion for her "Born This Way" single. Hint hint

Oh yes, it's the King of Pop!
In the hit film, "Thriller",
before he is shown as a zombie,
Michael Jackson transforms into
an evil creature of the night.

Tyler Posey starring as Scott McCall in MTV's Teen Wolf
And, ladies, here is Jacob Black
 from Twilight who is (in case
ya didn't know) a werewolf
A young butterfly girl in Paramore's music video, "Brick by Boring Brick". It is suggested that her
wings represent her innocence, but later she tears them off out of fear
then runs and falls into a grave and is (supposedly) buried alive.

OK OK OK, so the media is very animal heavy/themed/laden. Whether you have noticed or not, we are always seeing animals. If it's not the dog across the street or the swarm of flies in the trash can it's the things we see everyday. 

But why? Why choose animals? Is it because it's only natural for us to express our "inner-animal" through song and video? But why? Why the recurring theme? Wouldn't that just be getting old/repetitive? No, it's much more subtle than that. 

Sex SELLS. This so-called "Freedom" sells. Indulgence sells. All this is a consistent way to rake in boatloads of cash! The more cash, the more encouragement there is to continue! With all of this happening what are we to do? Give up the TV and smash the iPod? Curse the internet? Uh, duh, NO. Well, erm, you can, if you really want to, and that's great, but these things can also provide a good lesson in self control. No one is forcing us to give into temptation and no one is forcing us not to. We do have a choice. 

Imagine a little girl who really wants a puppy, and she comes across a rabid, growling, stray dog standing behind a trash can in a dark alley. Excited, she runs home and begs her parents for that dog. When she pulls them over to the alley to show them where the dog is, what should the parents do? They want to keep their daughter satisfied, and they agreed to finding her a fluffy companion, so would it make sense for them to say, "Sure sweetie! Whatever you want! Boy, he's mighty cute!"

They would get her away from this creature as soon as possible, this thing could attack at any time! Then the little girl gets a little lesson on why stray dogs are dangerous, so then she can later choose for herself not to make the same mistake again. She'll get her puppy, but the parents need to do research so that they can aim for the best furry companion they can give her. 

We can choose not to spend hours watching tv everyday. We can choose not to watch that movie, just 'cause everyone else has seen it. We can choose not to buy the hot new rap single where the lyrics are:

Sex sex sex sex
Drugs drugs drugs drugs
Alcohol Alcohol

Men can choose not to watch porn. Women can choose not to give themselves away to every sleaze ball who looks at them. We can choose to listen to our Heavenly Father and to turn away from anything that keeps us from Him. Look guys, the solution is simple: it's all a part of choosing to do right over wrong. It is difficult to do, especially nowadays with all that I've been talking about above, but it really is simple. Many argue that practicing Christians are restricted from doing what is "natural" when they wear a purity ring or stay home from parties. But what they don't know is that choosing to do right isn't a way of resisting your desires; it's the way of protecting them from becoming bruised and battered.  

Remember to go to the Father first before diving into poor media choices. Ask Him what He thinks about it. God designed the desires of your heart, and He understands them and what you are going through. Don't let the world tell you how to be satisfied, and don't let your heart become like the rabid stray dog, and don't be blinded from what is true. Oh, and one more thing, you're not an animal. YOu are a human. And you are free to let loose your heart and soul, the true way.  

BTW, if you wanna check out what kind of content is in the next upcoming film, it is likely it is one this site. Trust me. It's the shiz.  

Peace out!!!!

Thursday, July 5, 2012

God is Scary + Using Your Imagination

Aaaaaand I'm back. From South Dakota. And what does the internet have to show for missing me so much?? Well, nothing, cuz the internet can't necessarily do anything for me... But some hacker from Russia decided to make an attempt at stealing my account. But because of Google's utterly creepy ability to track everything, they were able to prevent the attack from occurring. Thank you so much, Google! I think...

Many of the people who read my blog have already heard a great deal about my South Dakota trip, so I am not going to say much about it here. I will say though, for those I haven't talked to yet, it was a very good, exciting trip and I had a really fun time! It was pretty straightforward, the work and the layout of the trip, and nothing "miraculous" really happened, but that doesn't mean that God wasn't sowing seeds and working wonders! Heck, He is ALWAYS doing that, isn't He??? 

Now there's one thing that I learned on this trip. Actually this is something that I have learned once before. Or twice. Or quite possibly a cazillion times. It just goes to show how hilarious and pathetic it is that we humans think we are so awesome. When really we're not. And yet I still continue to forget how incredible God is, and that He's even there. Oh but, yes, He IS THERE. Because well, um, God is in everything, knows everything, made everything, understands everything, and IS EVERY -FREAKIN- THING!!! 

Also, God loves you, God knows you, and God sees everything that you are all at once. I am going to type that out again (and you, yes you, READ IT AGAIN). God loves, you, God knows you, and God sees everything that you are all at once. When He looks at you, which is all the time, He can see all of darkest corners of our hearts, the deepest spaces in your mind that you cannot reach, and He holds every fiber of your being close to His heart. Now that there is a very frightening thought. You cannot read this and tell me you were not frightened. OK, maybe you're not scared to go to sleep tonight, or you feel uneasy out of your brain, and hopefully you didn't just pee your pants, but I am hoping it at least got you thinking. 

Here's another thing, God is NOT boring. When you actually release your imagination (which is (need I remind you?) hand-crafted by God!) and ask God to let you explore just who He is, then you'll be quite shocked and amazed at how wonderful and loving God is! It WILL NOT be like when you hear the same thing over and over, you know, about God's love? And you hear it so much you start to get to the point where you shut it out or get sick of it or forget just what it means? Sadly, that happens to a lot of us believers. It happens to me a lot *raises hand*. Because we humans are naturally empty and desire for more, it is going to take a lot for us to realize how loving God really is without hearing over and over. We have to live in it, but in order to live it we have to explore it, and gradually increase our knowledge of His love through that. 

We must read the Bible with different eyes every time. That is the true visible word of God that we can pull out anytime (iPhone Bible app, anyone?) to study, explore, and gain fulfillment from. We must attend church every week a different person. The church is God's community that not only is a representation of but is unity, fellowship, and solid grounds of His kingdom right here on earth. Like I said before though, we can't just be hearing this or reading this over and over and not changing through it, we have to live it. 

I remember going on a retreat last year where this speaker really emphasized the beauty of the human mind and how it contains the power of imagination. We don't realize this, but the imagination is a part of reaching the very cores of who we are and has the potential to be destructive or healing. I could go on and on about imagination, but I won't. The thing I want to emphasize is how important it is that we grant God control over the imagination, He will reach us in ways we never could (haha!) imagine! 

Aaaaand in case you are wondering, I did NOT make this picture.
Though it does look like something I'd draw...

So whadduya waiting for??? DO EET!!! Surrender to Him like you never have before!! I'm off to do the same!!!!

Peace out, Bobby!

Teal Moustache